My Fantasy is to have a Live In Housekeeper – just like the Brady’s Alice! I love being with my children, it is the household tasks that come with this role that I dislike.
It is not being a stay at home parent that I do not like- I enjoy my children and I love spending time with them. It is the default role that seems to unavoidably come with being the parent that stays home- that of “homemaker”. Blech.
I realize that some truly enjoy this role and might even experience domestic bliss from keeping a house clean, laundry folded and three squares on the table. Not me.
My husband often implores me; just don’t do it. Do not worry about the mess, or the dishes or the laundry. We will deal with it later. He is so well intentioned, and he means it (for the most part).
It is unrealistic though; not cleaning up after a meal, or vacuuming up spilled cereal makes things gross. Given that I am the only adult home, I must do it.
I understand that I choose this role every day, but man, I sure would love an “Alice” to come and live with us. This is what I fantasize about- not a nanny, or a month long Hawaiian Vacation. I fantasize about a full time, live in housekeeper.
- Has breakfast, lunch and dinner ready and waiting on the table when we come in from sledding or the beach, or upstairs from the playroom.
- Keeps the kids books organized so that one does not end up folded inside the other, causing the pages to tear.
- Removes the oatmeal from the chair before it dries.
- Makes sure that there is always a sippy cup that is clean and ready to go (including cover and valve to avoid spilling and leaking).
- Does all of our ironing.
- Makes sure that we are always stocked with Peanut Butter and Almond Milk, and that the fresh fruit is always washed and ready to be served.
If only I had someone to do these things, I would enjoy this role of being at home more, I tell myself. While I am quite sure I will never find out if this is true, I really do believe that it is.
Though my husband encourages me to ignore the household tasks, laundry is something that can be done in between stories, and strawberries can be washed and cut while my children are sitting at the counter chatting with me.
I am trying to learn to be more “Zen” about the homemaker part of my job description, because I do feel some resentment brewing and nowhere to place it.
I guess really, my only resentment is toward Alice. Why did she have to go and work for those Brady’s anyway? I have less than half the kids, they are much cuter, and I would have allowed her the humble privilege of working gratis.
Your loss, Alice. Your loss.
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How about you? What would you have Alice do?