Consensual Living Punishment Free Home and How to Avoid Sibling Rivalry Weekly Round UP #11

You say you want to know what to do instead of what not to do.  You say you want to learn how to live more peacefully in your home.  If you mean it, you will read these articles in their entirety.  You will bookmark this page and read them over and over again until you fully understand them.  This, my friends, is it.  This is what my family and I are working toward.:

Creating a Climate for Consensual Living by Consensual Living
“Trust in a child’s ability to know their body and know their mind. Respect for their feelings as true, valid and important. If a child feels safe and comfortable they can explore their feelings and are more interested in understanding the feelings of those around them. There is no room for punishments or rewards in this environment. Punishments and rewards are really just tools of manipulation and when you are working together as a team for shared solutions there is no need to manipulate.” Click here to read.

Midland, Michigan.  Thanks to Rebecca Barwick Elowski for sharing her photos with us!
Midland, Michigan. Thanks to Rebecca Barwick Elowski for sharing her photos with us!

Okay.  As if that last piece wasn’t enough to help you make some serious changes toward peace in your home, here are some more specifics of how to improve things!  I absolutely love Parenting Beyond Punishment, and highly recommend that you like and follow them on Facebook and anywhere else you can.  I have learned so much from them.  You can start right here:

Phrases that Inadvertently Foster Sibling Rivalry and What to Say Instead by Parenting Beyond Punishment

“One of the challenging parts of parenting is being mindful of the things we say. Our words are our children’s inner voice. And many times we may not even realize the ways in which our words influence their behavior. Remember that comparing our children to each other promotescompetition, not cooperation. Here are some phrases that foster sibling rivalry, and what we can say instead.”  Click here to read.

Portsmouth, UK. Thank you Jennifer Murray for sharing your photo with us!
Portsmouth, UK. Thank you Jennifer Murray for sharing your photo with us!

But wait!  That’s not all.  Here is one more piece from my favorite set of parents around- and I have never even met them. In fact, I do not even know their real names!  If you are serious about freeing your children, then Free Your Kids is a family you should be following.  Every post they share is better than the last, and unlike some people (ahem, ahem) they do not go off the deep end when someone pisses them off (do they even get pissed off?!).  Here is an excellent introductory article (both to them, and to living peacefully with your kids):

You Don’t Punish your Kids?!  WHAT?!

“He wouldn’t stay on the Naughty Step. He’d just laugh at us. And if we persisted with the use of physical force, he would go apeshit. He became completely uncontrollable. So, we took the drastic step (for us) of completely abolishing punishment. My wife, Mama Bear, had spent considerable time researching this, mainly at The Natural Child Project website.  It took her a long while to convince me to even try it.  I was so stuck in my ways and quite pig-headed.  It made no sense to me.  ”What, we just let him get away with it?”  I remember saying that all the time.  Eventually, I gave in and we decided to attempt it on a trial basis and see what happened.” Click here to read.

Thanks for being with us everyone. Here’s to a weekend filled with more peace, understanding, and connection than the last!  Catch you next week!