Bringing home a new baby changes everything- especially our relationship with our first born. ”Weekend with My Guy” shares my much needed reconnection with oldest child.
I thought the adjustment of adding a new member to our family was most challenging for me. Then during a perfectly ordinary conversation with my son, I realized that he is almost four years old. The difference between almost four and not yet two and a half (his age when Sydney was born) is vast. This was the last time we had spent lots of quality time together.
At that moment I ached for time with just Owen. Not just a few minutes while Sydney napped, or even a meal out or trip to the playground, but a good solid chunk of time. In the same way that couples take a weekend away to rediscover each other with the goal of deepening their relationship, I wanted to set aside an overnight for my number one and me.
I told my husband of this desire and he said, “Do it next weekend.” So we are. We are leaving today. Owen and I are heading to the White Mountains of New Hampshire. It is a short ride for us, and while I have explored several options of things to do while there, we have no plans for our time together. In the same way a husband and wife escape to relax and do whatever they decide in the moment, Owen and I will arrive at our hotel and see where the time takes us.
I can’t remember ever being so excited for a trip- even my honeymoon, a “trip of a lifetime” could not compare to my upcoming venture.
Knowing that for the next thirty -six hours, Owen and I will again be just us two affects me on a level deeper than I knew I had in me. The eagerness that I feel toward fully knowing him again has already given me fulfillment that I had not expected.
I do of course have reservations about leaving my daughter. It will be my first time leaving her for more than a couple of hours and she still nurses frequently throughout the night. I cannot bear the thought of her waking up in the middle of the night to find me not next to her, calling for mommy and me not being there. I know that she is with her dad who loves her immensely and takes great care of her- I trust that her needs will be met.
I know that Kris has already planned out multiple options of how to soothe her. I trust that my husband values her comfort as much as I do. And so with that knowledge, I will put her needs second for just the next thirty -six hours so that my beautiful first born can have his needs met uninterrupted.
For the sake of my first born, I will leave my worries about my daughter at home. I will fully and completely immerse myself in this time with my son. We will open the sunroof on this beautiful spring day, leave the radio off and spend a carefree weekend. Just me and my guy.