Welcome to the Spank Out Day 2012 Carnival
This post was written for inclusion in the Second Annual Spank Out Day Carnival hosted by Zoie at TouchstoneZ. Spank Out Day was created by The Center for Effective Discipline to give attention to the need to end corporal punishment of children and to promote non-violent ways of teaching children appropriate behavior. All parents, guardians, and caregivers are encouraged to refrain from hitting children on April 30th each year, and to seek alternative methods of discipline through programs available in community agencies, churches and schools. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
Spanking: A Day to Consider
Though I cannot differentiate between physical abuse and spanking, I acknowledge that some people believe there is a difference and that spanking is necessary. Maybe to avoid a dire consequences or simply so that the parent maintains their rightful control.
I will surely be accused of thinking that I am a perfect parent by saying that I have never hit, spanked, swatted, slapped or physically hurt my children. Rest assured though, that I have made horrible and rotten parenting choices. So many that if I allow myself to think of them all at once I fear they would collectively crush me.
So today, I would just like to ask everyone to consider what this day is about. This is a day to bring awareness to a societally accepted practice that should have disappeared before it started. To challenge what you are being told and taught and to ask yourself if it feels right, and if you really want your relationship with your child to be based on the fear of being physically hurt.
I ask you to consider it from your child’s perspective. That precious little baby whom you want nothing more than to love and connect with, who is scared and in pain every time you spank or hit him. Who cannot differentiate between the mother who hugs away her nightmares but also raises her hand.
Her father who will protect her from all those who try to hurt her, but also must be feared.
So maybe today is a day to consider the information and perspectives that are being offered as a part of National Spank Out Day. They are all offered as a means of support, knowledge and encouragement and I hope that you will utilize them.
Click here to read about my own journey toward gentle discipline.Thank you for spending some time with Our Muddy Boots. Click on these links to join us on Facebook or Twitter for more conversation and inspiration. Or you can subscribe to have each post delivered right to your inbox or reader by clicking that orange and white button at the very top of the page. I hope that you will visit often, we are glad that you are here!
On Carnival day, please follow along on Twitter using the handy #SpankOutCar hashtag. You can also subscribe to the Spank Out Day Carnival Twitter List and Spank Out Day Carnival Participant Feed.
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
- What Spanking Taught Me Meg at MommyStoleTheSugar explains the spankee’s perspective and how it has affected her disciplining choices as a parent.
- A Memory of Spanking Wolfmother at Fabulous Mama Chronicles explores her own upbringing and how it has affected her and why she is changing the way she relates to her children.
- Redirecting the Impulse to Spank Amy W. shares at Natural Parents Network about her experience redirecting the impulse to spank, and encourages all parents to respond with sensitivity and redirect anger before it becomes harmful.
- Perspective is Everything Patti at Canadian Unschooler learns to heal from the trauma caused by the childhood death of her sister, and gains a deeper understanding of her own mother’s love for her as a child.
- Remembering and Recharging Emily at The Other Baby Blog shares how she refocuses her mindset during high-stress times.
- Does spanking work? Megan at TheBehavioralChild Megan at The Behavioral Child lists the five reasons why spanking doesn’t work.
- Love is All There Is: A Spank Out Day Post Tree at Mom Grooves shares her thoughts about needing to find a way to discipline her 5 year old that could give her daughter the boundaries she is craving while still treating her with only love and respect.
- Discipline isn’t SOmething You Do; Discipline is SOmething You Have Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children questions how parents can expect their children to show self-control if they, themselves, do not exhibit slef-discipline.
- No Spanking, No Yelling, No Time Outs….What’s Left? Sheila at A Living Family shares that though spanked as a child herself, she has made efforts towards an alternative approach to setting limits.
- Forgiveness is possible; loving others in a way that works for us Kelly Hogaboom finds that if we are to raise our children in humane fashion, we must first recognize our own humanity.
- Dear Daniel, (On Discipline and Love) Amy at Anktangle writes a letter to her son about the many choices we have in life: how we treat people, how we parent, and how we use our bodies in the process.
- Spanking: A Day to Consider Our Muddy Boots recognizes that some see a difference between abuse and spanking, and maybe today is a day that we can consider some other perspectives and utilize available resources to make different choices.
- Mutual Respect
Sithyogini at Very Nearly Hippy learns how mutual respect between parents and children lead to peaceful parenting.
- I Hit My Kids and Now Begins The Real Work To Heal The Honesty Conspiracy hosts this powerful, anonymous story about how it’s never too late to start on a different approach to spanking.
- How To Talk To Parents About Gentle Alternatives To Spanking Zoie at TouchstoneZ shares some useful ways to discuss the often divisive issue of spanking.